Wednesday, July 7, 2010


                 As I work on sharing the story of how I came to be an only parent, I am finding myself thinking more and more about privacy and anonymity.  I am not ashamed of my story.  Telling my story is not only therapeutic but it may help someone else out there feel not quite so alone.  But a dear friend emailed me today and asked if I had thought about any potential impact to my son in the future if he were to come across the blog or if his friends were.

Now I HAD thought about this, but now I am thinking more.  There is a line between being open/honest and maintaining some privacy for the sake of family members not being harmed in any way.

So where does that leave me in making sure that I can openly express myself but also protect him?  I could use some feedback here!  : )


  1. I don't think there is a right answer. Only you know what is going to be good for you and your son. And "you" includes the whole you, not just the mom part of you.

    What I can tell you is that as I have blogged, the freedom to honestly express myself - my truths, my faults, my weaknesses, my strengths, and my stoies - has really helped me better define who I am and what is important to me. It has allowed me to see myself more clearly and more confidently because as I hit "Publish" I am clear in what I am saying and sharing regardless of how I am percieved by a reader. That is not to say that I do not edit myself and refrain from "putting some of my stuff out there" - but typically I am able to weave my words in a way that allows me to be honest, forthright, without being naked and too exposed.

    That being said, I am not in the position yet, that "a reader" could be my son. Nor am have I lived your story or know your whole truth. So I struggle - because what I want to say is that your story is worth telling and sharing - not only for others, but also for you. I want to say that your son, eventually, will know hear the entire story from various sources...and being able to know the story from your perspective, as written by you as a person, not just you as a mom, may be ok - dare say, good even?!!?

    I don't's a hard one. But I do know that you will make the best decision for your family.

    'been thinking of you!

  2. I go by a psuedonym as well because I don't want people to be able to google me and find my blog. I'm certainly not ashamed, I just don't want anyone IRL to read it without my permission. It's easier to be 100% me if I'm doing it psuedo-anonymously.

    That said, I do post pics of me (and sometimes of my monsters)from time to time. I think it's easier for others to connect when they put a face to an idea.

    Doing what you feel is best for you and your little man is great! Obviously, only you know exactly what that is.

  3. There are ways my children's identities are protected, even if I do show pics from time to time. The girls know about my blog, but they don't visit it. They sometimes read my posts on Parentella and the now-defunct LA Moms, which are more general, but they understand that my blog is my place. They also already know that everything is true.